Substance Part II

II. Living in the Moment.

This is a big topic. And I've been thinking a lot about it lately.

On Sunday, afterwards, when J and I were discussing, he said "They say it's good to live in the moment. I'm not so good at it, but sometimes..." Granted, this was his justification for our "casual" sex. I just wonder if its so casual. Although, on Sunday it was I guess. Casual enough for me to go have sex with someone else.

Religion addresses this often, I think; in varying and varied degrees. In yogic theory, being present is very important. I've always associated this with Living in the Moment (the elusive moment), but perhaps there is a difference. Christianity does NOT approve of living in the moment: one should live for the afterlife, although it varies from one denomination to the others. Not sure about Judaism or Hindu or Islam's take on this - but it seems they are all quite focused on the "next life". It's not so good for a society as a whole if everyone lives for the moment.

And is there a difference between living IN the moment and living FOR the moment. Living IN it implies that you do not think about past or future. Let go of all the baggage from the past, and ignore the consequences (good or bad) in the future. Just do, right now, what's right for you. Notice I did not only say do "what's right." Living FOR the moment; what's that? It implies that there is no future; you might get hit by a bus and whatnot. I guess the latter idea is a little more reckless, but they are both quite selfish.

This is why religion, and therefore society, do not like these "momentary" living strategies. It's important that we all take care of one another, and religion and all that strategy are designed to reinforce societies and keep us all living (relatively) happily and safely together.

But back to the yogic concept: be present. Discard the futile fragile things, and just boil it down to what's truly important. Be not unkind to people and yourself, and work towards oneness. That's oneness with yourself (being totally present) and oneness with the greater spirit. It gets a little woo-woo, I suppose, and I'm paraphrasing hugely.

I sent a drunken text message on Sunday Night to D, the true object of my affection lately, and I was beating myself up for it later. N said "What have you got to lose?" In the end, this is best advice I think. If you live in the moment and recklessly, you spend your savings and you "lose" your future security. But, "After a bottle of wine... when are you taking me to dinner?" doesn't lose me much, except maybe a little face.

I'm still not decided about whether sleeping with J is wise. But living in the moment it certainly was.