I can't figure out why I still miss him.

He's been gone nearly a month. Perhaps a month this weekend.

And yet, tonight, driving home, I started reminiscing with myself about the first time I met him. It's been so long, now, that I don't really remember all the details - not all the silly things I first romanticized. But I do remember going home with him and its almost impossible for me to fathom doing that again with anyone else.

I'm sure it will happen again - I'm sure I will be attracted to other men again. I don't feel particularly attractive myself now, so that's part of it, perhaps.

I just want him to figure out whatever he's got to figure out and then figure out that he left one of the best things behind and come Do something about it. And he won't because he's not The One but if he was, that's what he'd do.